Two: The beautiful circle
If you’re already following along with my series, “Make a Start on Decluttering” then you can skip this intro. Go straight to👇🏻 Two: The Beautiful Circle.
But if you’re new here, are you overwhelmed by your stuff, struggling to keep your house tidy, or finding it hard to focus on what’s most important to you? This is for you.
I’ll be releasing these posts over the next few weeks, and while there are practical, how-to tips in each post, the focus is on changing your mindset, and reframing how you look at things, to make decluttering possible.
I have personal experience. I have twice been overwhelmed and had to fix it. Let me tell you I’m not going back for a third try! Not a chance!
By the way, I’ve got a bookish competition running right now if that’s your thing … see here. ☺️
Two: The Beautiful Circle
You’ve heard of the vicious circle (or sometimes called vicious cycle), right?
What if I told you there’s a beautiful, helpful circle that you can tap into that will help you declutter?
All it requires is for you to decide what is most important in your life.
You can phrase it however you like. Whatever works for you. Simplifying. Distilling. Editing down to the most essential. Or just deciding where you want your focus.
Here it is:
Distilling down what’s most important to you naturally highlights what isn’t that important.
Once you can see that, it’s so much easier to keep what you need for your goals and the life you want to lead, and say goodbye to the rest.
and…
As you declutter what doesn’t fit, the things you’ve deemed important come into starker focus.
They’re no longer so easily hidden behind that pile of jigsaw puzzles you thought you might start doing in the evenings but never got to.
This is how I found out that really, I didn’t want to learn to do my own sparkly acrylic nails (💅🤭). I accepted that I didn’t want to paint inspiring messages on little rocks, nor did I have time for wood slice painting.
I realised I only liked the idea of kayaking each weekend. I saw plainly that I would never keep working towards my black belt, especially once I moved and would have to travel half an hour for every class.
With a powerful air of nostalgia from remembering a fond camp my son and I made—literally the only time I used the camping gear outside of some cute pretend camps we made in our garage—I finally got rid of the gear which I had held onto for fifteen years.
I almost can’t believe that as I write it. Let me repeat it, just to be sure.
FIFTEEN YEARS … yep. Crikey.
I didn’t want any of those things badly enough, and what a blessing it was to accept it and so be able to give away all the stuff that was associated with those activities that I had held onto and allowed to take up space in my life.
They weren’t unworthy goals, just to be clear. They just weren’t for me.
Strategy:
Start a list. Put the obvious and more certain activities at the top. Those you already know (or suspect) are most important to you.
Then below, write some of those you’re less convinced of.
I won’t list out all my personal goals, but to give you an idea, I have things like faith, family, writing and fitness near the top.
Learning to play the piano, which is something I’m very excited about the idea of—and I’ve been giving a bit of a go already—is near the bottom.
I’d like to do it, but I don’t know yet if I have the staying power. I admit that, so I’m giving it some time. Waiting to see. That’s okay.
But as I’ve already explained, there were many, many activities that I had already come to grips with as being things that were clogging up my home and my life when realistically, they weren’t important to me.
In time, some activities will crowd out others, too. Writing crowded out oil painting for me. That’s how my oil painting died as a hobby. Well, there were a couple of other factors that lent weight to it, but ultimately, I simply didn’t have time for both. Writing won.
(You can read about my novels The Red Line and The Strange Brew)
Imagine these art goods x 500 and then understand that, unable to make a decision, I let it all sit and clog up my space for three years. DON’T be like me! 🤦🏻♀️😂
Don’t wait. Get started!
In part one of this series, I said you needed to be careful about not letting huge amounts of stuff back into your home during and after decluttering. But I also said that you don’t have to completely overcome that mental habit before you start the physical act of paring down your possessions.
The ideas here in Part Two are exactly the same.
Maybe this is easy for you—if you already have a clear idea of what you want in life, I am thrilled for you. If that came out sounding sarcastic, believe me, it wasn’t! It’s a dream to be in touch with your true heart like that.💗
But if you’re more unsure and need time, that’s okay.
Just don’t let it become an excuse not to start. Your decluttering can begin in other areas. Remove clothing that doesn’t suit or fit, or kitchen goods that you have multiples of, or never use. There are myriad areas in which to start.
And you must start. That’s my point!
Remember, all that stuff you keep you have to clean, maintain, organise, and store. Heck! You’re probably even paying insurance for it!!
For me, there’s an even worse aspect of this: things take up mind space because when you see these objects you have thoughts about them.
‘I must get around to trying that.’
‘I should do something with these.’
‘I really wanna…’
Must. Should. Want. Wish. Guilt. Depression. Argh!!
Too much.
Clarify what you really want from life and set yourself free from all that junk!
I’m sure you won’t regret it.
Tell me your problem areas
What hopeful hobbies and interests have you collected “stuff” for? And how much of it do you think you’ll use in the next 6 months? In the next year? In the next decade? Tell me about it in the comments.
Again, I’m not looking down from my ivory tower, watching you struggle over this. I’m getting in touch with what I want the focus of my future life to be as well.
Thanks for reading, lovelies. I’ll be back shortly with part three.
Morgan x 💝
P.S. I’d love to have you join my email list to receive my (very occasional) news. Most emails are a wrap-up about my fiction writing, with some links to blogs I’ve written (whether it’s decluttering, writing, or simply my view of life). Plus, occasional sales offers and competitions.